Article - Golf Quotes by Wen Zientek-Sico Looking for the perfect golf quote to add to a plaque, hanging, T-shirt, or other craft project? Look no farther! Here are our favorite inspirational and funny golfing quotes.

It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course.

~ Hank Aaron

The friends you make on the golf course are the friends you make for life.

~ Jessica Anderson Valentine

Golf is a game where the ball lies poorly, and the players well.

~ Anonymous

Golf is what you play when you're too out of shape to play softball.

~ Anonymous

If it goes right, it's a slice. If it goes left, it's a hook. If it goes straight, it's a miracle.

~ Anonymous

In golf as in life, it's the follow through that makes the difference.

~ Anonymous

Real golfers don't miss putts, they get robbed.

~ Anonymous

If you don't succeed at first, don't despair. Remember, it takes time to learn to play golf; most players spend their entire lifetime finding out about the game before they give up.

~ Stephen Baker

A ball will always come to rest halfway down a hill, unless there is sand or water at the bottom.

~ Henry Beard

Follow-through: The part of the swing that takes place after the ball has been hit, but before the club has been thrown.

~ Henry Beard

Have you ever notices what golf spells backwards?

~ Al Bolska

If you're going to throw a club, it is important to throw it ahead of you, down the fairway, so you don't have to waste energy going back to pick it up.

~ Tommy Bolt

Golf is a game where guts and blind devotion will always net you absolutely nothing but an ulcer.

~ Tommy Bolt

The greatest liar in the world is the golfer who claims he plays the game for merely exercise.

~ Tommy Bolt

One of the advantages bowling has over golf is that you seldom lose a bowling ball.

~ Don Carter, pro bowler

In golf I'm one under; one under a tree, one under a rock, and one under a bush….

~ Gerry Cheevers

Golf is a game who's aim it is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller hole with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose.

~ Winston Churchill

They say that life is a lot like golf ~ don't believe them. Golf is a lot more complicated.

~ Gardner Dickinson

The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing.

~ Phyllis Diller

Half of golf is fun; the other half is putting.

~ Peter Dobereiner

I know I'm getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer spectators.

~ Gerald Ford

By the time a man can afford to lose a golf ball, he can't hit it that far.

~ Lewis Grizzard

Your financial cost can best be figured out when you realize that if you were to devote the same time and energy to business instead of golf, you would be a millionaire in approximately six weeks.

~ Buddy Hackett

I've had a good day when I don't fall out of the cart.

~ Buddy Hackett

My worst day on the golf course still beats my best day in the office.

~ John Hallisey

Golf is a game in which you yell 'fore', shoot six and write down five.

~ Paul Harvey

Golf is like faith: it is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

~ Arnold Haultain

As you walk down the fairway of life you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round.

~ Ben Hogan

The only thing a golfer needs is more daylight.

~ Ben Hogan

It is nothing new or original to say that golf is played one stroke at a time. But it took me many years to realize it.

~ Bobby Jones

I don't think I'll live long enough to shoot my age. I'm lucky to shoot my weight.

~ Bruce Lansky

I used to go to the driving range to practice driving without slicing. Now I go to the driving range to practice slicing without swearing.

~ Bruce Lansky

Never putt until the cup stops moving.

~ Bruce Lansky

Some golfers fantasize about playing in a foursome with Arnold Palmer, Jack Nicklaus, and Sam Snead. The way I hit I'd rather play in a foursome with Helen Keller, Ray Charles, and Stevie Wonder.

~ Bruce Lansky

On a recent survey, 80 percent of golfers admitted cheating. The other 20 percent lied.

~ Bruce Lansky

Learning to play golf is like learning to play the violin. It's not only difficult to do...it's very painful to everyone around you.

~ Hal Linden

When you get up there in years, the fairways get longer and the holes get smaller.

~ Bobby Locke

Golf is so popular simply because it is the best game in the world at which to be bad.

~ A.A. Milne

I have a tip that can take 5 strokes off anyone's golf game. It is called an eraser.

~ Arnold Palmer

Golf is 20 percent mechanics and technique. The other 80 percent is philosophy, humor, tragedy, romance, melodrama, companionship, camaraderie, cussedness, and conversation.

~ Grantland Rice

Golf is not just exercise; it is an adventure, a romance…a Shakespeare play in which disaster and comedy are intertwined and you have to live with the consequences.

~ Harold Segall

Any game where a man sixty can beat a man thirty ain't no game.

~ Burt Shotten

There is an old saying: If a man comes home with sand in his cuffs and cockleburs in his pants, don't ask him what he shot.

~ Sam Snead

What goes up must come down. But don't expect it to come down where you can find it.

~ Lily Tomlin

When I'm on a golf course and it starts to rain and lightning, I hold up my one iron, 'cause I know even God can't hit a one iron.

~ Lee Trevino

I'm in the woods so much I can tell you which plants are edible.

~ Lee Trevino

It's the most fun I've ever had with my clothes on.

~ Lee Trevino

I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes they would have come up sliced.

~ Lee Trevino

Golf is a good walk spoiled.

~ Mark Twain

Golf is like any other sports competition. There is not a whole lot of point to it unless someone suffers.

~ Kevin Wohl